All In A Day's Work

Saturday, October 13, 2007

Supposed to be preparing to go out. But I'm lazing on my bed, refusing to budge. Just wanna slip back into my dreamland and not move.

Feeling kinda lethargic and I have no idea why I think of him so much again. I think I'm allergic to Shaved, skinny, fair men... And the allergic reaction will be those memories I'm trying to let go of.

I don't feel the best of health and I really hate it. It constantly reminds me of the ominous effect and the depressing result. It makes me feel I'm better off dead now than anything else.

Blank. Blank. I don't feel like talking to anyone, or interacting but I have to work later. And I probably need to put on my mask of smiles again. SO tiring.

I feel like going for a short getaway... I feel like being closer friends wwith people I nv thought be friends. I feel like being let into their world and take a peek inside for once instead of always skimming surfaces. And I realized why I'm all fort up.

What if I let someone take a peek inside and they'll realize.....

Its all empty inside?

Lost.IN.Translation.

Friday, October 12, 2007

I have no thoughts.

I guess its zen.. the feeling of being content...

Was Siew Hua's birthday, Karen came over and we had a good lunch.

I wore a pretty white skirt which made me lady-like loads.

I got more pretty pictures from TCS and his nonsense made me smile.

I sent pretty pictures to TCS to share and I hope he likes it as I like his too.

I took the bus and train with SQ and she made me laugh loads too...

I talked to Xinyu online and she "kissed" me and "flirted" her nonsense and i sense she's happy and I am too.

She's going for a short break, so I hope she gets a good rest (finally) and unwind all her stress and troubles.

I got presents from Louie who came back from Thailand and bought loads for all of us in GIS.

I got a msg from Zafar even tho he's all the way in Bangkok and yet he's still willing to spend to converse through SMS.

I wish him luck with upcoming championships and I'm confident he'll win something for me to see.

I feel He's confident and quite happy, so I am too.

I am contented.

My friends are happy and I am zen. :)

Lost.IN.Translation.

Sunday, October 07, 2007

HAving a bad headache...

Hai.. Just came back from work and am planning to tuck in early coz i have to be ON TIME for work tomorrow!!!

Coz my boss is back already... And also that I'm gonna be really busy tomorrow!

Hope everything goes smoothly...

요즈음 난 일윤을 많이 생각한다. 보고 싶지요. 오랜만이에요. 그가 어떻게 지냈다? 행복한까? 그가 난 기억지 않아 보야요. 그럼 좋아지요? 나도 그가 일윤에 대해 완전히 잊을수 있으면 좋아지요... 힘들다! 포기하고 싶다!

Lost.IN.Translation.

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Third time I'm blogging~! Ahhhhh~!!!!!!!!! I'm so unhappy!

I think my friend is avoiding me. The moment I came online, He went offline..

????????????????????????/

TCS, he sent me pretty pictures... it cheered me up some.... :)

I wonder if I can post some of his pics here... WOnder if he'll mind...

Hai~

Lost.IN.Translation.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Its been a pretty long day~ cruising thru half of what I dun remember happened.

So tired so tired so tired. To the extend that I was actually reluctant to go home...

But I made it back at last.

I just wanted to squat in a corner, rolled in a ball and sob till my eyes pop and i lose my voice in that cold dark corner of the cold room....

I just feel..... I need release. And even crying won't make it any better.

Despite my own sadness, I tried cheering Xinyu up as she is feeling unwell and she seems upset today..

I guess my attempts were a tad bit futile.... Damn my fake smile.. Lol...

But i think for that moment, she did look a little relieve. And I feel a tad bit happier she smile...

Sometimes I feel, when I Listen to my friends, I listen and feel the pain and emotions instantaneously. But I had to hide the pain; because its not abt me. I don't want them to feel like they are troubling me.

For me to feel this pain and emotions, I don't know, it seems to come naturally. I seem to relate to people's pain or even feel sympathatic for strangers I see.

And after I made them smile, I'll go and cry it all away... It feels like I've helped them eat all their troubles and turn them to my tears...

But for my own, I drown in them. Tearing just dun seem to take my pain away...

I'm such a crybaby........

Lost.IN.Translation.

Monday, October 01, 2007

Children's Day...

Its ending soon. A few more minutes and all will be the past...

Just like the PAST that has repeated itself each year.

I look fondly at the plastic bunny bag with loads of little colourful sweets :)

I was so happy; my little surprise at the busy time of my job-

Peeked; was a smiley face from the side of the restaurant door.
Suddenly a wave of buzz went throughout the floor.
Looking over at the commotion, excited faces, people who cared, calling out to me
Walking over, I saw the cause of disruption, my heart's eruption; happiness, I'm blessed. The sweetest sweets I'll ever eat. My silly piggy shyly holding out that bag to me. thrusting into my hands, looking anxiously around (he's afraid of boss! lol!) he smiled and say he'll call me after work again. HAppy Children's Day!
A present I got from bugging him the whole morning.

My children's day. I'm such a child. A precious one, loved by him.

That was all I ever needed.
---------------------------------------

Busy day today, kept my mind off things awhile.

Once i managed to pace myself again, I smile i teared i missed him so.

My children's day; i'm not a child anymore.

Jaded, weary, a tired old soul...

All I want to do is curl in bed and pretend to be dead. OoH magic day...

I think I hurt someone unintentionally again....

But I have made it pretty clear over the years that I am not interested. And even when he returned to his country, he msges me.

Its fine, as long as the msges stays friendly. But how do I reply to a; "I miss you very much"?

And now........... i have no idea what to do.

Lost.IN.Translation.